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May you find great value in these inspirational George Carlin Quotes from my large datebase of inspiring quotes and sayings.
I think it's the duty of the comedian to find out
where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.
- George Carlin
As soon as someone is identified as an unsung hero,
he no longer is.
- George Carlin
Just when I discovered the meaning of life, they changed it.
- George Carlin
Think of how stupid the average person is,
and realize half of them are stupider than that.
- George Carlin
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Inside every cynical person,
there is a disappointed idealist.
- George Carlin
By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.
- George Carlin
The reason I talk to myself is because
I'm the only one whose answers I accept.
- George Carlin
One great thing about getting old is that
you can get out of all sorts of social obligations
just by saying you're too tired.
- George Carlin
One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends
is that three out of four murders
are committed by people who know the victim.
- George Carlin
If it's true that our species is alone in the universe,
then I'd have to say that the universe
aimed rather low and settled for very little.
- George Carlin
Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"?
- George Carlin
So far, this is the oldest I've been.
- George Carlin
Most people with low self-esteem have earned it.
- George Carlin
I put a dollar in a change machine. Nothing changed.
- George Carlin
No one knows what's next, but everybody does it.
- George Carlin
If it requires a uniform, it's a worthless endeavor.
- George Carlin
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
- George Carlin
Honesty may be the best policy,
but it's important to remember that apparently, by elimination,
dishonesty is the second-best policy.
- George Carlin
I love and treasure individuals as I meet them;
I loathe and despise the groups
they identify with and belong to.
- George Carlin
I would never want to be a member of a group
whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood.
- George Carlin
The IQ and the life expectancy of the average American
recently passed each other in opposite directions.
- George Carlin
I don't like to think of laws
as rules you have to follow,
but more as suggestions.
- George Carlin
If a man smiles all the time,
he's probably selling something that doesn't work.
- George Carlin
The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music.
- George Carlin
Capitalism tries for a delicate balance:
It attempts to work things out so that
everyone gets just enough stuff to keep them from
getting violent and trying to take other people's stuff.
- George Carlin
Religion has convinced people that there's an invisible man
... living in the sky. Who watches everything you do
every minute of every day. And the invisible man
has a list of ten specific things he doesn't want you to do.
And if you do any of these things,
he will send you to a special place, of burning and fire
and smoke and torture and anguish for you to live forever,
and suffer, and suffer, and burn, and scream,
until the end of time. But he loves you. He loves you.
He loves you and he needs money.
- George Carlin
What we think, we become.
All that we are arises with our thoughts.
With our thoughts, we make the world.
- The Buddha 
Think big thoughts but relish small pleasures.
- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
Every thought we think is creating our future.
- Louise L. Hay
Life is as easy or as hard as you think it is.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
To know yet to think that one does not know is best;
Not to know yet to think that one knows
will lead to difficulty.
- Lao Tzu
I don't think of all the misery
but of the beauty that still remains.
- Anne Frank
If I feel depressed I will sing.
If I feel sad I will laugh.
If I feel ill I will double my labor.
If I feel fear I will plunge ahead.
If I feel inferior I will wear new garments.
If I feel uncertain I will raise my voice.
If I feel poverty I will think of wealth to come.
If I feel incompetent I will think of past success.
If I feel insignificant I will remember my goals.
Today I will be the master of my emotions.
- Og Mandino
Truth is not defined by
how many people believe something.
Ask. Question. Think.
Decide - for yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Excellence is the result of
caring more than others think wise,
risking more than other's think safe,
dreaming more than others think practical,
and expecting more than others think possible.
- Anonymous
Tolerance is the first principle of community;
it is the spirit which conserves
the best that all men think.
- Helen Keller
Children are born innocent.
Before they are domesticated they live in the moment,
love without fear, and don't even think about the opinions of others.
- don Miguel Ruiz
Exercise free-will.
CHOOSE each and every action you make,
every thought you think,
and every emotion you feel.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
People should think things out fresh
and not just accept conventional terms
and the conventional way of doing things.
- R. Buckminster Fuller
Know that life is as easy or as hard as you think it is.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Every thought you think
and every word you speak
is affirming something.
- Louise L. Hay
It isn't what you have, or who you are, or where you are,
or what you are doing that makes you happy or unhappy.
It is what you think about.
- Dale Carnegie
The important thing is not to stop questioning.
Curiosity has its own reason for existing.
- Albert Einstein
With every rising of the sun
Think of your life as just begun.
- Ella Wheeler Wilcox
You become what you think about.
- Earl Nightingale
We are shaped by our thoughts;
we become what we think.
When the mind is pure, joy follows
like a shadow that never leaves.
- The Buddha
Take time to laugh.
It is the music of the soul.
Take time to think.
It is the source of power.
Take time to play.
It is the source of perpetual youth.
Take time to read.
It is the fountain of wisdom.
Take time to pray.
It is the greatest power on Earth.
Take time to love and be loved.
It is a God-given privilege.
Take time to be friendly.
It is the road to happiness.
Take time to give.
It is too short a day to be selfish.
Take time to work.
It is the price of success.
- Anonymous
You can choose to be peaceful right here and now ...
it has nothing to do with what other people do or think.
- Gerald Jampolsky
Inaction breeds doubt and fear.
Action breeds confidence and courage.
If you want to conquer fear,
do not sit home and think about it.
Go out and get busy.
- Dale Carnegie
What you think of me is none of my business.
- Terry Cole-Whittaker
You hold onto religion, you know,
rules, regulations, traditions.
I think what God is interested in
is people's hearts, and that's hard enough.
- Bono
The most important things in life
are seldom the most obvious.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
God is not what you imagine
or what you think you understand.
If you understand you have failed.
- Saint Augustine
Stand up to your obstacles
and do something about them.
You will find that they haven't
half the strength you think they have.
- Norman Vincent Peale
The simplest questions are the most profound.
Where were you born?
Where is your home?
Where are you going?
What are you doing?
Think about these once in a while
and watch your answers change.
- Richard Bach
Live so that when your children think of fairness,
caring and integrity, they think of you.
- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
The biggest mistake we could ever make in our lives
is to think we work for anybody but ourselves.
- Brian Tracy
You know that place between sleeping and awake,
that place where you can still remember dreaming?
That's where I'll always think of you.
- James M. Barrie
The main purpose of life is to live rightly, think rightly, act rightly.
The soul must languish when we give all our thought to the body.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
As you discover your daily good,
and believe in it, and think about it,
expect it to continue.
- Ernest Holmes
You must do the thing that you think you cannot do.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
To kill an error is as good a service as,
and sometimes even better than,
the establishing of a new truth or fact.
- Charles Darwin
Do not think that love,
in order to be genuine,
has to be extraordinary.
What we need is to love without getting tired.
- Mother Teresa
If only the people who worry about their liabilities
would think about the riches they do possess,
they would stop worrying.
- Dale Carnegie
The function of education is to teach one
to think intensively and to think critically.
Intelligence plus character - that is the goal of true education.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
When you are reluctant to change,
think of the beauty of autumn.
- V. B. Brown
Think for yourself and question authority.
- Timothy Leary
A great gift requires two people,
the giver and the receiver.
Think of a football pass -
skillfully catching the pass, the gift,
is fully as important, and difficult, as throwing it.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The world is more malleable than you think
and it's waiting for you to hammer it into shape.
- Bono
The most important thing about Spaceship Earth -
an instruction book didn't come with it.
- R. Buckminster Fuller
Our character is what we do when we think no one is looking.
- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
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