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Jokes Quotes
Inspirational Quotes about Jokes

May you find great value in these inspirational Jokes Quotes from my large datebase of inspiring quotes and sayings.

A loyal friend laughs at your jokes
when they're not so good,
and sympathizes with your problems
when they're not so bad.
- Arnold H. Glasgow

Related topics: Cute Whimsey Friendship Relationship

I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb...
and I also know that I'm not blonde.
- Dolly Parton

I don't make jokes.
I just watch the government and report the facts.
- Will Rogers

A lot of the jokes had some build-up to some nasty stuff.
But most of it was all character situations leading
to what the ultimate payoff would be for that character.
- Shawn Wayans

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Forgive, O Lord, my little jokes on Thee,
and I'll forgive Thy great big joke on me.
- Robert Frost

I've included these little jokes and mysteries in my
writing for the amusement of readers.
- Armistead Maupin

A civil servant doesn't make jokes.
- Eugene Ionesco


 

When my mother died, I had to go on air that night and do jokes.
- Graham Kennedy

The thing about all good horror movies is that the
fans expect a couple of inside jokes.
Maybe I'm supposed to be saying how terrified I was while making it,
but it was really fun.
- Margot Kidder

You achieve the surreal jokes through the realism by making it elastic.
- Dylan Moran

Different taste in jokes is a great strain on the affections.
- George Eliot

My dog was with me all the time.
I talked to my dog.
She was my best buddy.
I shared all my secrets with her, but I don't think
I every really tried jokes out with the dog.
- Cathy Guisewite

I'm not a standup.
I don't really have jokes.
I don't have 10 minutes.
It took a while for me to realize this.
- Julia Sweeney

I'm not Mr. Debonair Suave.
I'm just a regular boy who goofs around,
pulls pranks, and makes jokes.
That doesn't sound very hot to me.
- Jensen Ackles

I never believe them when they say that because you
really have to sort of be aware of what's going on
in the news in order to get the jokes on the show.
- Samantha Bee

I don't mind making jokes, but I don't want to look like one.
- Marilyn Monroe

For every ten jokes you acquire a hundred enemies.
- Laurence Sterne

I can tell jokes.
I can talk to the audience.
I can relax.
I can change my songs whenever I want.
I can change the tempos.
I can change the mood, because I'm in charge.
- Robert Goulet

You want to do mankind a real service?
Tell funnier jokes.
- the Woody Allen movie Stardust Memories (1980)

The best ideas come as jokes.
Make your thinking as funny as possible.
- David Ogilvy

There's a sense of spontaneity, and no emphasis on jokes in this show.
People generally talk the way they talk in life if
you were in this particular situation.
- Larry David

All the jokes in my films, the comedy,
they're not me, I just try to hold a big mirror up to us.
- Yahoo Serious

I know these jokes aren't great, ladies and gentlemen,
see this is the problem you run into when you're between impeachments.
- David Letterman

I grew up in an environment of jokes and sarcasm and puns.
I talk that way, so I write that way.
- Allan Sloan

I don't care if my jokes are appropriate for a kid.
- Drew Carey

I crack jokes and play games and that's really more
my nature than being cold.
- Bernhard Langer

It was a somber place, haunted by old jokes and lost laughter.
Life, as I discovered, holds no more wretched occupation
than trying to make the English laugh.
- Malcolm Muggeridge

I think the more the actor lets you know what he thinks of the character,
the less the audience cares - like a comedian who laughs at his own jokes.
- Neil LaBute

Almost anything makes me laugh, especially jokes at my own expense.
And I will never, ever admit to being ticklish anywhere.
- Judd Nelson

In New York there isn't that weird palpable competitive
thing where it's friendly but everyone isn't trying
to top one another with jokes when you're just hanging around.
- David Cross

You can't just yell jokes at people.
- David Cross

Honest good humor is the oil and wine of a merry meeting,
and there is no jovial companionship equal to that
where the jokes are rather small and laughter abundant.
- Washington Irving

You know, my first album, some of those jokes I'd done
for twelve years because I couldn't throw 'em out.
- Ron White

I think repeating yourself is a sign of old age,
telling the same joke again and again.
Especially if they're jokes that don't make people laugh.
- Simon Le Bon

Writing for young children I find I often use particular
jokes with words and exaggerated,
funny events, but some of these haunt the more complex
stories for older children too.
- Margaret Mahy

Johnny Carson started the jokes about me and Marlin in his monologues.
- Jim Fowler

I don't like jokes in speeches.
I do like wit and humor.
A joke is to humor what pornography is to erotic language in a good novel.
- James Humes

If you keep making jokes like that, somebody is going to shoot you,
father.
- Mary Todd Lincoln

I guess I'm like Roger Miller who used to say that
he didn't have as many jokes as he thought he did.
- Glen Campbell

When I make a book, I make it for the child and not for the parent -
no jokes in it for the parents!
- Dick Bruna

Perhaps our Irish friends should not so completely
turn their backs on their historical dishes,
no matter how many jokes they might have to endure.
- Nick Clooney

I love life in spite of all that mars it.
I love friendship, jokes and laughter.
- Tahar Ben Jelloun

Sometimes people get passionate about the obscure jokes.
- Martin Short

I don't want to be 60 years old standing on stage telling some jokes.
I want my life to mean something.
- Steve Harvey

People make jokes about how black people are the first ones to be killed off.
- Sanaa Lathan

My whole life, I've been telling jokes.
- Brad Garrett

I don't consider myself a comic but a performer.
A comic tells bad jokes.
- Sandra Bernhard

The people that become the biggest jokes are people who do not change.
They stay the way they were in the past.
Look at Michael Jackson, he never evolved.
- Corey Feldman

It had more layers than an onion.
These writers meant business.
There was a level for everybody.
Your major could be celestial mechanics,
and there'd be celestial-mechanics jokes.
- Billy West

If you want anything done well, do it yourself.
This is why most people laugh at their own jokes.
- Bob Edwards

Soon I learned that the worse the puns and jokes,
the funnier they could be, if you knew how to deliver them.
- John Lasseter

There's a few tunes of mine that don't have jokes,
but most of them have a joke and they have a humorous point of view somewhere.
- Mose Allison

Zac Efron is like a brother who's just goofy and crazy.
He plays a lot of practical jokes.
- Ashley Tisdale

In polite society one laughs at all the jokes,
including the ones one has heard before.
- Frank Dane

I've always been terrible on regular sitcoms with lots of jokes.
I don't know how to tell jokes.
- Rainn Wilson

A difference of taste in jokes is a great strain on the affections.
- George Eliot

Everyone for the most part is really nice.
There have always been jokes, but that's part of being in the spotlight.
You can't make everyone completely happy.
- Tina Yothers

It is requisite for the relaxation of the mind that we make use,
from time to time, of playful deeds and jokes.
- Thomas Aquinas

If you were on the phone with me and Tommy right now,
we would probably forget you were there,
we'd just be cracking jokes.
It's like Beavis and Butthead.
- Nikki Sixx

Sometimes we have to actually say, I think you're really funny,
but none of your jokes are going to make it on the air.
So just answer my questions.
Seriously.
- Rob Corddry

The storyboard artists job is to plan out shot for shot the whole show,
write all the dialog, and decide the mood,
action, jokes, pacing, etc of every scene.
- Craig McCracken

When there are no women on the tour it can get awful and ugly -
constant horrible jokes and gross behaviour.
It needs to be leavened with a feminine presence.
- Evan Dando

I have friends who are going through chemotherapy,
and they make the darkest, most hideous cancer jokes you've ever heard.
- Kathy Griffin

The most fun I ever have is sitting in with Rick writing,
and we laugh at our own jokes.
- Adrian Edmondson

A serious and good philosophical work could be written
consisting entirely of jokes.
- Ludwig Wittgenstein

It's the teenage and university crowd,
so we give them lots of sex jokes and gross humour.
- Keenen Ivory Wayans

I try to exist in a world where there is freedom of opinion,
where you're allowed to make jokes.
I don't want to live in some PC world where no-one's allowed to say anything.
- Boy George

I guess my idea of a good audience is one that's quiet and listens,
but also that's alive: they respond,
they're getting the jokes,
they're with me.
And that' s been happening.
- Dan Hicks

I reserve the right to tell shaggy dog stories or even
common jokes as part of what I'm doing.
I don't give a damn if half the audience walks out.
- David Antin

It's much easier to make jokes about sensitive issues
if there is some dissent,
some conflict.
- Mo Rocca

Family jokes, though rightly cursed by strangers,
are the bond that keeps most families alive.
- Stella Benson


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