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Think of how stupid the average person is,
and realize half of them are stupider than that.
- George Carlin
I think it's the duty of the comedian to find out
where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.
- George Carlin
As soon as someone is identified as an unsung hero,
he no longer is.
- George Carlin
I would never want to be a member of a group
whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood.
- George Carlin
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One great thing about getting old is that
you can get out of all sorts of social obligations
just by saying you're too tired.
- George Carlin
Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"?
- George Carlin
Inside every cynical person,
there is a disappointed idealist.
- George Carlin
Most people with low self-esteem have earned it.
- George Carlin
If a man smiles all the time,
he's probably selling something that doesn't work.
- George Carlin
Honesty may be the best policy,
but it's important to remember that apparently, by elimination,
dishonesty is the second-best policy.
- George Carlin
I don't like to think of laws
as rules you have to follow,
but more as suggestions.
- George Carlin
Just when I discovered the meaning of life, they changed it.
- George Carlin
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
- George Carlin
If it requires a uniform, it's a worthless endeavor.
- George Carlin
The reason I talk to myself is because
I'm the only one whose answers I accept.
- George Carlin
One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends
is that three out of four murders
are committed by people who know the victim.
- George Carlin
No one knows what's next, but everybody does it.
- George Carlin
By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.
- George Carlin
If it's true that our species is alone in the universe,
then I'd have to say that the universe
aimed rather low and settled for very little.
- George Carlin
The IQ and the life expectancy of the average American
recently passed each other in opposite directions.
- George Carlin
The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music.
- George Carlin
I love and treasure individuals as I meet them;
I loathe and despise the groups
they identify with and belong to.
- George Carlin
So far, this is the oldest I've been.
- George Carlin
I put a dollar in a change machine. Nothing changed.
- George Carlin
Capitalism tries for a delicate balance:
It attempts to work things out so that
everyone gets just enough stuff to keep them from
getting violent and trying to take other people's stuff.
- George Carlin
Religion has convinced people that there's an invisible man
... living in the sky. Who watches everything you do
every minute of every day. And the invisible man
has a list of ten specific things he doesn't want you to do.
And if you do any of these things,
he will send you to a special place, of burning and fire
and smoke and torture and anguish for you to live forever,
and suffer, and suffer, and burn, and scream,
until the end of time. But he loves you. He loves you.
He loves you and he needs money.
- George Carlin
What we think, we become.
All that we are arises with our thoughts.
With our thoughts, we make the world.
- The Buddha
I don't think of all the misery
but of the beauty that still remains.
- Anne Frank
Think big thoughts but relish small pleasures.
- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
Life is as easy or as hard as you think it is.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Every thought we think is creating our future.
- Louise L. Hay
To know yet to think that one does not know is best;
Not to know yet to think that one knows
will lead to difficulty.
- Lao Tzu
If I feel depressed I will sing.
If I feel sad I will laugh.
If I feel ill I will double my labor.
If I feel fear I will plunge ahead.
If I feel inferior I will wear new garments.
If I feel uncertain I will raise my voice.
If I feel poverty I will think of wealth to come.
If I feel incompetent I will think of past success.
If I feel insignificant I will remember my goals.
Today I will be the master of my emotions.
- Og Mandino
Tolerance is the first principle of community;
it is the spirit which conserves
the best that all men think.
- Helen Keller
Excellence is the result of
caring more than others think wise,
risking more than other's think safe,
dreaming more than others think practical,
and expecting more than others think possible.
- Anonymous
Truth is not defined by
how many people believe something.
Ask. Question. Think.
Decide - for yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The important thing is not to stop questioning.
Curiosity has its own reason for existing.
- Albert Einstein
You can choose to be peaceful right here and now ...
it has nothing to do with what other people do or think.
- Gerald Jampolsky
People should think things out fresh
and not just accept conventional terms
and the conventional way of doing things.
- R. Buckminster Fuller
You become what you think about.
- Earl Nightingale
Take time to laugh.
It is the music of the soul.
Take time to think.
It is the source of power.
Take time to play.
It is the source of perpetual youth.
Take time to read.
It is the fountain of wisdom.
Take time to pray.
It is the greatest power on Earth.
Take time to love and be loved.
It is a God-given privilege.
Take time to be friendly.
It is the road to happiness.
Take time to give.
It is too short a day to be selfish.
Take time to work.
It is the price of success.
- Anonymous
Know that life is as easy or as hard as you think it is.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
We are shaped by our thoughts;
we become what we think.
When the mind is pure, joy follows
like a shadow that never leaves.
- The Buddha
Every thought you think
and every word you speak
is affirming something.
- Louise L. Hay
It isn't what you have, or who you are, or where you are,
or what you are doing that makes you happy or unhappy.
It is what you think about.
- Dale Carnegie
With every rising of the sun
Think of your life as just begun.
- Ella Wheeler Wilcox
Exercise free-will.
CHOOSE each and every action you make,
every thought you think,
and every emotion you feel.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Children are born innocent.
Before they are domesticated they live in the moment,
love without fear, and don't even think about the opinions of others.
- don Miguel Ruiz
Be more concerned with your character than your reputation,
because your character is what you really are,
while your reputation is merely what others think you are.
- John Wooden
To change who you are,
change who you think you are.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
We must dare to think "unthinkable" thoughts.
- J. W. Fulbright
Life is fully as bad as you think it is,
so never think life is bad.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Prayer is not asking for what you think you want,
but asking to be changed in ways you can't imagine.
- Kathleen Norris
You must do the thing that you think you cannot do.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
The most important things in life
are seldom the most obvious.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The main purpose of life is to live rightly, think rightly, act rightly.
The soul must languish when we give all our thought to the body.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Men and women are not prisoners of fate,
but only prisoners of their own minds.
- Franklin D. Roosevelt
People hardly ever make use of the freedom which they have,
for example, freedom of thought;
instead they demand freedom of speech as a compensation.
- Soren Kierkegaard
Stand up to your obstacles
and do something about them.
You will find that they haven't
half the strength you think they have.
- Norman Vincent Peale
To kill an error is as good a service as,
and sometimes even better than,
the establishing of a new truth or fact.
- Charles Darwin
God is not what you imagine
or what you think you understand.
If you understand you have failed.
- Saint Augustine
The biggest mistake we could ever make in our lives
is to think we work for anybody but ourselves.
- Brian Tracy
The function of education is to teach one
to think intensively and to think critically.
Intelligence plus character - that is the goal of true education.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
You can do what you have to do,
and sometimes you can do it
even better than you think you can.
- Jimmy Carter
You are braver than you believe,
stronger than you seem,
and smarter than you think.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
The great enemy of the truth is very often not the lie,
deliberate, contrived and dishonest,
but the myth, persistent, persuasive and unrealistic.
- John F. Kennedy
When you keep getting the wrong answers,
try asking better questions.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
If a million people say a foolish thing,
it is still a foolish thing.
- Anatole France
If a problem cannot be solved, enlarge it.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
Cheer for endings - whether goals have been met or not -
whether the ending is tidy or ragged.
Without endings, there would be neither the opportunity
nor the incentive to think new thoughts,
and to begin great new projects.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
When you think you're out of time,
smile, and turn back the clock.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
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